Things i need to learn to do...

I always get inspired with the chicken soup articles that i subscribe to, and for months i have been just hitting the delete button without reading them because i simply didn't have time.
Today, i read one which entitled" If I Were Lucky". I didn't think it has nothing to do with the subject lucky at all but it does have a list of things i think are the things i need to learn to do . I need to learn

the art of letting go
not to look at the watch and keep rigid rituals and joyless appointments
not to ask for Perfection
not to worry
to travel the world ( the three months around the world tour that we are planning )
to sit outside the house and look at the sky and the people who goes by
to turn up the music loud and dance or shut my eyes to enjoy the moment
to spend time doing nothing
to sit back and relax....

The most well earnt $500 dollars

I have been teaching for a 5 weeks vacation swim program at a local pool. I started doing it because i needed my 20 hours practical experience in order to sit for an exam and qualify being a swim teacher. But i didn't know what i was into until today. It made the whole experience so much more meaningful and enjoyable.

Essentially , this vac swim program is organised by Royal Life Saving Society of Australia in Canberra. Every lesson only cost $3.50 for each child. Over 5 weekends, the kids will be taught how to swim and survive in the aquatic environment. What impress me most is the cost of each lesson. Usually, with programs like this, each lesson will cost about $ 10 to $ 12 dollars. In short, it is like a charity but for kids to learn to swim.

I heard from my co-ordinator that this program helps those family who don't have spare money for their kids to learn swimming. She saw that some families who came last year are here again this year. I am happy that i am part of a great cause and i am happy to see that so many other instructors are so dedicated to teach kids to swim without getting paid much.

I love love love the kids. I also started to learn some of the kids related syndromes that are affecting our kids today - ADHD, Cystic fibrosis, Austism, Asperges, Asthma etc. It is very rewarding when they progress in their lessons each week.

The kids make me feel really happy. They are so pure and angelic. And they make me smile with their funny stories and behaviours.

I don't earn a lot out of this but i think it is one of the most meaningful $500 dollars i have ever earnt.

Its not because i am different, its because i am special.

The moment when a human cry because of architecture is the time when u know the architect has succeeded. That's how i feel after watching " My Architect" - the documentary about Louis I Khan, ( known as Lou in this film )

" Very sad" is the emotion that Malcolm has for both Lou and his son. He also thinks Lou's buildings are very solemn and melancholic.

I wonder how he managed to keep three " wives " ( live four lives ) and has three kids, without the wives knowing each other's existence until he passed away. It also puzzles me why he kept his private lifes so secretive. Did he know that it was very disrespectful of women? I think that's the way he keeps himself sane; by having many women in his life while keeping himself ever so inspired in architecture. Wait... could it be the other way around?? arrghhhh....

In another perspecitive, this film also reminds me of the relationship i had with my dad. I never really knew my dad. He passed away when i was as young as Nathaniel Khan when Lou passed away. Well, my dad is no architect but i think he is as close to one as can be. Over the years, i have learnt quite a bit of him from the stories i heard from relatives and friends of him. I know i am living his shadow eventhough he has been gone for 16 years now.

One of the few most vivid memory i had with my dad was him teaching me the dos and don'ts about being a human. He emphasized a lot on being morally right and respectful of others. Other memories of him was sadly about him suffering through the last few months of his life. Funny enough, I think i am learning more about him now as i draw and draw on paper, sketching and finding the solution to a construction and architecture problem. ( He used to sketched on a piece of napkin in a restaurant whenever he can )

I think the best thing about watching this film to me is i finally understood something very important about myself, One of the reason why this blog is kept " alive".

I have finally understood my existence.

It answered my questions about why i am so different, why i can' be like the people at work, why i tried so hard yet i can't be what the society needs or wants me to be?

The asnwer lies in this simple equation : Its not because i am different, its because i am special.

I just need to keep working hard on what i love to do... be it architecture or not.